We Are People with
Disabilities
Recently, an article in our Temple's
monthly bulletin referred to people with disabilities as
'access-limited'. My wife, Denise, sent the following to the author
early the morning after receiving the bulletin;
“I seem to be having one of my sleepless nights. One of the things
disturbing my ability to fall asleep is that I find myself ruminating
about the term in the subject line of this email that you used in
your temple bulletin article. When I first read it, I couldn't put my
finger on why it offended me, but in thinking about it in the wee
hours of the morning realize how dismissive the term is in the
context of how you used it. Referring to those of us who have
disabilities as just 'access limited' only addresses the physicality
of our experience; it doesn't acknowledge the exclusion we come up
against as we experience the discrimination of being stereotyped,
patronized, and ignored by members in our own Temple Sinai community.
It doesn't help when leadership employs euphemistic terms to placate
others' (or their own) discomfort; it really just allows everyone to
keep their head in the sands and promotes "the suffering of
being different" for all of us, instead of rejoicing in our
diversity and the benefits of reaping what we all bring to the
table.”
First, I want to acknowledge the
importance of this topic. For anyone to lose a night's sleep, get out
of bed and type a whole email should really tell us to pay attention
and do something about it.
We are people with disabilities.
All my life, people have tried to come
up with euphemisms for this. In recent years, the use of euphemisms
has worsened. Some people do this out of fear of 'labeling us'. Some
people do this hoping not to offend us. Many people use euphemisms in
the hope of being more inclusive. No matter how well intentioned,
euphemisms results in more exclusions and more isolation.
It's hard to imagine how identifying
someone as 'differently-able' or 'access-limited' or 'challenged'
would make that person feel part of a group or that the group would
somehow feel more inclined to include that person. Using euphemisms
can imply that disabilities are shameful or sinful. Using euphemisms
not only reminds us that we are different, it tells us we don't
belong anywhere.
There are some people with disabilities
who may feel challenged by their disabilities. There are some people
with disabilities who are differently able and perhaps even diverse
able – though honestly I'm not sure what that means. Most people
with disabilities have felt handicapped by their disabilities in
various situations. Some people who may choose to closely identify
ourselves politically and/or culturally with the disability community
may be referred to as a disabled person, Among friends, we might
refer to ourselves as crips or gimps (generally impaired). What is
true for all of us is that we are people first and we have
disabilities.
While this may answer the 'who are we'
question, it doesn't address Denise's main issue re how to make
Temple Sinai a truly welcoming and inclusive place for all people,
including people with disabilities, Education is paramount. She and
the Temple's Education Director just completed a wonderful Disability
Awareness Course for post Bar/Bat Mitzvah students. The students toured our whole Temple and made a list of ways to make it more
accessible for people with disabilities. Along with education,
working together is how true camaraderie is achieved. People with
disabilities need to be encouraged to actively participate in all
aspects of Temple Life. Our Access Committee and Social Action
Committee must take on more disability related issues. I'd love to
see all our teens and young adults have the opportunity to work or
intern, side by side with peers with disabilities, in civil service
jobs including personal assistant services.
There's always so much more we can and
must do to be the welcoming community we want to be. A critical step
is recognizing and acknowledging who we are. For Denise and me, we
are people with disabilities.
